(The Happiest Job on the Planet)

"You! Yes you! Move faster man!"

(explosive intro)

I get laid off at Home Depot
Get a certain job at Walmart, where you get yelled everyday you work
For moving too slow, or doing a poor job of stacking stock
As items move your way on a conveyer belt from the truck

But from the top it is well known that the managers who run the show
Will only shovel more and thrash you, until their hand bleeds blood red!

(interlude)

(Another Day at Walmart)

We don't want no underpaid wage
We don't want no shouting boss
A store that sells such poorly made things
Why is this store at the top?

Hey! Walton! How'd you get so high?

All in all it's just another day at Walmart...
All in all it's just another day at Walmart...

We don't want to work with weirdos
Supervisors who only yell
Where harder workers get lower wages
Come on, Walmart, what the hell?

Hey! Walmart! How'd you get so high?

All in all, it's just another day at Walmart
Everyday, it's just my, Goshdarned life at Walmart...

(solo)

"Wrong! Stack it again!"
"If we don't have it in stock! It's not going to be in the back! Why would it be in the back if you don't see it in stock?!"
"You! Yes, you over there in the break room! Back to work man!"
(repeat shouted lines until fade out)