Hey, Mr. Bastard
This seems like an empty office
Wonder why that's the case? Have to say
It's my fault, in the habit of tossin'
All those fools who need to stop it
The big jerks, so obnoxious
So sure that they'll piledrive my face now
But they were the ones departed
I'm a martial-type artist
Belt records in my wallet
10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, ticks are tockin'
Time is rocketin'
To the point where I'm cuttin' in
My point's what I'll illustrate cause you're bein' shite
And for me, hurlin' jerks ain't arduous

If you're an arsehole, a little douchey
Exudin' badness in ways non-groovy
Afraid I'll have to go to town
See that pile of dudes makin' a mess? I
Threw that jerk, threw that jerk, threw that jerk
My eye's a-twitchin' and yet you're laughin'
Don't look the model for violent smashin'?
Well, while your eyes are rollin' round
I'm just thinkin' 'bout who last did this, I
Threw that jerk, threw that jerk, threw that jerk

Hey, you wanna know why all your mates ditched you at the door? It's cause
They've lived through a sudden window toss
Even huge jerks who smirk before they punch
Will run when one hates thugs
You wish they woulda told you that?
They did, a lot, I heard 'em holler, man
The option that they offered was go real fast
Because I've set the bar real low for bad, like, damn
Do you have an off-skew hat?
You'll plummet into the sidewalk for that
And if you even dare to call me mad
You will go squish and I won't be sad
No need for panic
That real hard stop, you'll pan it
At least there's no glass smash with
Cause I've had too much practice

Ain't cleaned your shoes off? Well, that ain't groovy
You'll feel the damage when you go smooshy
Not sure if you'll still hit the ground
With that big ol' pile makin' a mess, I
Threw that jerk, threw that jerk, threw that jerk
I'll keep on ditchin' all of your asses
Until you bother to clean your glasses
Eyewear or cups? Don't matter now
Cause you're gonna be makin' a mess, I
Threw that jerk, threw that jerk, threw that jerk

Oh-ooh-oh-ooh-oh-oh
Just watch 'em go
Straight down like so
Threw that jerk, threw that jerk, threw that jerk, j-j-jerk-jerk
Oh-ooh-oh-ooh-oh-oh (afraid it's, afraid it's, afraid it's so)
And down you'll go (right down you'll, right down you'll, right down you'll go)
Why? I don't know (no, I don't, no, I don't, no, I don't know, but who cares?)
Threw that jerk, threw that jerk, threw that jerk

A total psycho? Wait, who could you mean?
Overreactin', that's kinda rude, see
Which means you'll soon be fallin' down
And you'll join that huge pile-o'-dudes mess, I
Threw that jerk, threw that jerk, threw that jerk
Tryin' your disses, straight through, they're passin'
Just like a window, a lightbulb's flashin'
I made a promise to throw down
Anybody who walks through that door, I
Threw that jerk, threw that jerk, threw that jerk