I can see-ee this, love to na-ame shit
Whether inanimate or rea-ea-ea-eal
But what's chu-urnin' my brain, it's whi-irrin'
Is the huge lack of thought I fee-ee-eel

Your names aren't diff'rent, why-y-y-y-y-y?
You name them a-all Steve, their names are a-all Steve
Lampshade and the li-i-i-i-i-ight
Both share the na-ame Steve, the one damn na-ame, Steve
Ev'ry single fry-y-y-y-y-y
You give the na-ame Steve, each one is na-amed Steve
I gotta ask you why-y-y-y-y-y
Must they be na-amed Steve? What's with the na-ame Steve?
Don't get it, why-y Ste-e-e-eve?

Can't you see it? You're 'bout ten kinds of crazy, no doubt
Leave your tics at the doo-oo-oor
Oh, I'm overreacti-i-in'? Only cause you insi-i-ist
That your dumb names aren't wro-o-ong

I just need to know why-y-y-y-y-y
The names are a-all Steve, all hinges o-on Steve
Both your car and bi-i-i-i-i-ike
Are friggin' na-amed Steve, even your boa-oard's Steve
It just wrecks my mi-i-i-i-i-ind
Your dog is na-amed Steve, your fish is na-amed Steve
You force me, day and ni-i-i-i-i-ight
To call the floo-oor Steve, to call the doo-oor Steve
To say my na-ame's Ste-e-e-eve

Oh, I just worry, I worry, bu-uddy
Oh-oh, it's no-onsense, somethin's (yeah)
Wrong with your mind, somethin' plain cracked in your mind, I'm bettin' (oh, might go insa-a-ane)
Oh-oh, it's no-onsense, face it
Not in the right, your name convention ain't right, deal with it (I'm worried)
Oh-oh, it's no-onsense, hang on
Thought in my mind, I'm gonna ask you outright, out with it (if you just lo-ove Ste-e-e-eve)
Why ain't your name Ste-e-e-e-e-e-e-eve?