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Song Parodies -> "Mark Apparel Up for Spring"

Original Song Title:

"Hark, the Herald Angels Sing"

Original Performer:

Wesley, Mendelssohn, Cummings

Parody Song Title:

"Mark Apparel Up for Spring"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

According to the site where I found the lyrics: "Hark the herald angels sing"was written by Charles Wesley, brother of John Wesley who founded the Methodist church, in 1739. A rather sombre man, he requested slow and solemn music for his lyrics and thus "Hark the herald angels sing" was sung to a different tune initially. Over a hundred years later Felix Mendelssohn (1809-1847) composed a cantata in 1840 to commemorate Johann Gutenberg's invention of the printing press. English musician William H. Cummings adapted Mendelssohn's music to fit the lyrics
Mark apparel down for spring,
Close-outs on clothes for skiing.
Peeps of earth through the snowpiles.
Togs for winter�second aisle.

Quotes for new spring fashions rise.
Made in China, priced sky high.
See the bombastic boasts proclaim:
"Christ woulda worn this�check the hem!"

Mark apparel up for spring,
Boring! this old recession thing.

Prices climbing heavenward
At Neiman, Taylor & Lord.
Despite all, gotta have some;
Spring duds have a burgeonin' sum.

Veils that show flesh all can see,
Made for carnal revelry.
Pleases man, makes his gland swell,
Beats the squeeze he-manual.

Hard, apparel-inducing�
Price be damned, he's ready to spring!

On seventh floor�prints from Greece
Markdowns from Olympics fleece.
Light and lithe to wear these things�
Give up Baked Alaska flings.

Mindless fashion-orgy buy.
First hems are low; then they're high.
You won't get your money's worth,
Of which there soon will be a dearth.

Mark apparel up for spring,
Boring! this old recession thing.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 1
 
 2   0
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 0
 
 3   1
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 4   0
 1
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 5   11
 10
 11
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

John Jenkins - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Very clever parody, John. My fave line was "beats the squeeze he-manual."

As a Methodist, I appreciate your introductory comments, although I think you're a little harsh on Charles Wesley. It should be noted that he wrote 6,500 hymns, so Malcolm, Will, and others have a long way to go to catch him.
Johnny D - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Fast is John Barry rising!
Soon to be Submitter-King!
AFW - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Very Madison Avenueish...and funny..no mark down..up to 555
John Barry - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, John--impressive output from Mr. Wesley! JD, I have been on a bit of a roll--don't know if that's good or bad. AFW, thanks.
alvin rhodes - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
clever concept and execution..5s
Stuart McArthur - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
loved the syllable matching to the OS title - nice wrok John - nice work too 555
Dee Range - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Also loved the he-manual line. Excellent parody, high 5's
Meriadoc - November 17, 2004 - Report this comment
Clever idea!
Michael Pacholek - November 18, 2004 - Report this comment
Gotta love that Martha Stewart: Kmart (which sucks, I know, I've shopped there) buys Sears (which really sucks, I know, I worked there for a year and a half), and Martha Stewart makes $32 mill in her Club Fed cell! Of course, clothes aren't just marked up for spring. Markup is a trend for all seasons.

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