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Song Parodies -> "The Barney Haters Song"

Original Song Title:

"This Old Man"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"The Barney Haters Song"

Parody Written by:

Cryptic Wizard

The Lyrics

Since Barney ripped off this song for his "I Love You, You Love Me" song, it is only approprate to use it in revenge.
This young man, he played one
He shot Barney with a submachine gun
With a knick-knack paddy whack--Barney is a putz
This young man hates Barney's guts

This young man, he played two
He kicked Barney with a steel-toed shoe
With a knick-knack paddy whack--Barney is a putz
This young man hates Barney's guts

This young man, he played three
He broke both of Barney's knees
With a knick-knack paddy whack--Barney is a putz
This young man hates Barney's guts

This young man, he played four
He made Barney hit the floor
With a knick-knack paddy whack--Barney is a putz
This young man hates Barney's guts

This young man, he played five
Barney should not stay alive
With a knick-knack paddy whack--Barney is a putz
This young man hates Barney's guts

This young man, he played six
He stabbed Barney with pointed sticks
With a knick-knack paddy whack--Barney is a putz
This young man hates Barney's guts

This young man, he played seven
He sent Barney straight to hell
With a knick-knack paddy whack--Barney is a putz
This young man hates Barney's guts

This young man, he played eight
He made Barney disintegrate
With a knick-knack paddy whack--Barney is a putz
This young man hates Barney's guts

This young man, he played nine
Then he ripped out Barney's spine
With a knick-knack paddy whack--Barney is a putz
This young man hates Barney's guts

This young man, he played ten
He did one through nine again
With a knick-knack paddy whack--Barney is a putz
This young man hates Barney's guts

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 21

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 0
 0
 
 2   1
 0
 0
 
 3   6
 4
 4
 
 4   3
 3
 5
 
 5   10
 14
 12
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

... - March 25, 2004 - Report this comment
So true!
Johnny D - March 25, 2004 - Report this comment
I don't actually hate Barney, but this parody's a hoot, so 555

I can't claim credit for the following.... I found it a long time ago somewhere on the Web.....

To prove that Barney is The Antichrist:

1. Given the obvious:
CUTE PURPLE DINOSAUR

2. Now, as in the Roman alphabet change all U's to V's:
CVTE PVRPLE DINOSAVR

3. Extract all Roman Numerals:
C V V L D I V

4. Convert to decimals:
C=100 V=5 V=5 L=50 D=500 I=1 V=5

5. Add them together to get:
100 + 5 + 5 + 50 + 500 + 1 + 5 = 666
alvin rhodes - March 25, 2004 - Report this comment
wow, i hate barney, but i never knew why...5s
Adagio - March 25, 2004 - Report this comment
There was always something a little too strange about Barney.
Ashley Carpenter - March 25, 2004 - Report this comment
I love it it is great.
Jeff Reuben - March 25, 2004 - Report this comment
Surprisingly funny! I didn't expect to laugh like I did when I first looked. Great job!
Vin Nistelrooy - March 25, 2004 - Report this comment
I don't hate Barney either. Well actually I hate anything so damn optimistic. Anyways, this was so damn clever I had to give three fives.
Troy - March 25, 2004 - Report this comment
Hahahahahaha that was a bloody good one mate!!! All 5's from me!!! Must admit the pacing is off with "This young man, he played seven he sent Barney straight to hell" as seven and hell don't match, but to bugger with that this song deserves all 5s!!!
Billy Slim - March 26, 2004 - Report this comment
I wonder if Barney and Tinky Winky are... ahem... 'best friends'.
Cryptic Wizard - April 12, 2004 - Report this comment
"Hell" and "seven" aren't supposed to match, there's a little joke there, since "seven" and "heaven" match, but Barney wouldn't go to Heaven, so...it's an old humor song trick, make the audience think you're going to say one thing because of the rhyme, but say something different (there are many that use this). It's funnier if you hear it out loud but I thought I should clarify that. Anyway, thanks for all the 5's everyone, this is the best I've ever gotten for any of my parodies!
Baby Kitty - April 19, 2004 - Report this comment
This was written by my sweetheart, Cryptic Wizard! Isn't he a hoot??!! Gotta love those parodies!
devilgirl168350 - May 02, 2004 - Report this comment
THIS IS WHAT I THINK OF BARNEY: I HATE U! U HATE ME! LET'S GET TOGETHER AND KILL BARNEY! WITH A B.B. GUN AND SHOOT HIM TO THE FLOOR! NO MORE PURPLE DINOSAUR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!­!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
turkey - May 05, 2004 - Report this comment
I don't [i]hate[/i] him; I find him unappealing. But I couldn't help but laugh while reading this; gotta give it five-five-five.
WhizkidF - August 20, 2004 - Report this comment
For those who loved that song, disliked Barney, and have a horde of young children: Better watch something more educational than that with your kids, such as "Sesame Street" or "Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood." This advice is from some reviewers of "Barney and Friends" at the Internet Movie Database.
Mr. X - August 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Pacing's off in a few places, but it's so funny. 4-5-5.
wat a crap - December 11, 2004 - Report this comment
tht was funny as hell! i dispise barney! bitch!bitch!Barney!!!!!!
Pair O' Dee - May 28, 2005 - Report this comment
HIL-arious. And yes, I caught the little rhyme trick on the number seven, very clever. 555
Schadenfreudian Slip - October 28, 2006 - Report this comment
I can't say that I "hate" Barney either...but I do find him annoying and I enjoy anti-Barney humour. And this is very clever, as other commentators have said above.
DA BARNY HATR - February 25, 2013 - Report this comment
THAT WAS DAMN FUNNY...LOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG STILL LAUGHING

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