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Song Parodies -> "My Screw Heaven"

Original Song Title:

"My Blue Heaven"

Original Performer:

Rudy Valee

Parody Song Title:

"My Screw Heaven"

Parody Written by:

Barry J. Mitchel

The Lyrics

Long ago c. 1927, TOS expressed the daily homecoming satisfaction of an American working family man. Much later as an empty-nester, he may have been singing new words to the same old tune.
When zipper thrills call,
Relieving is nigh;
I'll hurry to my screw heaven.

I yearn for the sight,
A little red light
Will speed me to my screw heaven.

'Twill be a mile-long race
At dire pace to cozy room;
In ample chest
I'll nestle there, my nose's doom.

Just Dolly and me evade STD;
We're happy in my screw heaven.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Afterglow (BJM) - November 23, 2011 - Report this comment
I'd change "mile-long" to "miles-long" and "We're happy" to "We grapple".
Val - November 23, 2011 - Report this comment
I thought this would involve a drill ;-)
Barry J. Mitchel - November 23, 2011 - Report this comment
Val: In a way, it does. Similarly, a woodworker's screw heaven would be the workshop with a large collection of fasteners. I'd change "dire" to "fiery" in line 8.
Old Man Ribber - November 23, 2011 - Report this comment
BJM - Just a turn to the right...at that house of red light! (I've sung that lyric at nightclub gigs for thirty years.) Delightful update. We need more Rudy Valee songs here. ;D
Barry J. Mitchel - November 24, 2011 - Report this comment
OMR: Thanks; TOS has been recorded by many since RV, but they tend to be stylized. I recall an old parody of TOS that was circulated in my high school; it ended with "There'll never be three. / We're careful in my blue bedroom."
Ginger Lent - March 13, 2022 - Report this comment
In my blue bedroom there's a smiling face on my pillow case and a form Devine, she's a worn out whore, she been had before, but tonight she's mine! Just Molly and me there'll never be three, we use protection in my blue bedroom

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