Not a whole lot of folks threatening with knives
So I don't get why you're so upset with mine
If there's food, I'd like to eat it
Far less mess on the table when in chunks, the meat's in
Got my own just because not one kitchen sharpens
Their knives the way I need it
So why must you be there raising hell?
Do you freak in shock at any shelf
Wherever knives are sold? Must be true
If the way you act right now's a clue

Harassing me, don't get why
All because of my knife
You're acting weird, that's right
All because of my knife, my knife

Honestly? I'm appalled you'd tell me to head off
Oh, because I'm prepared, no temper will be lost
When I find your knives are useless
Oh, keep mine in a case until I have the need
Whether for self-defence or a much smoother feed
So the way that you act feels clueless
You say I'm a threat to public health
When I only aim to help myself
And maybe be an example, true
For those who their steak, cannot get through

Threatening me, don't get why
All because of my knife
You're acting strange, that's right
All because of my knife, my knife

It's not like I'm wielding something bolder
Not the kind of dude who would straight refuse
To walk 'round all day without a gun
So could you go away (please go away)?

Sick of you guys, my food's getting colder
I don't get why you all want me to remove
Myself from this place, totally insane
Please explain why you hate my knife
It's nine feet long, true

Bullying me, don't get why
All because of my knife
You're acting nuts, that's right
All because of my knife, my knife