I am the very model of a G&S obsessional
I'll watch the operettas whether laymen's or professional
I like to ask "What never?" in a manner quite rhetorical
And quote from Thespis to Grand Duke in order categorical
I'm very well acquainted, too, with patters most satirical
I understand the plot twists that require a minor miracle
For absurdities of class I have a well-ingrained hostility
And many helpful facts on acts of lim'ted liability

And many helpful facts on acts of lim'ted liability
And many helpful facts on acts of lim'ted liability
And many helpful facts on acts of lim'ted liabilibility...

I'm very good at parodies and one song to another tune
Titwillow or Hail poetry or possibly some other tune
And I'll watch operettas whether laymen's or professional
I am the very model of a G&S obsessional


I know all of Trial by Jury and can sing it with avidity
And sing the Matter Patter with the required rapidity
I quote the best of Gilbert's rhymes that have more than one syllable
I think Sir Arthur cannot die, in fact he is unkillable
I think the plots are clever and I never have made fun of them
I know the tenor choruses despite not being one of them
I tell the fans of Lehrer that I've heard his music's din afore
And whistle airs from Pirates, Patience, Gondoliers and Pinafore

And whistle airs from Pirates, Patience, Gondoliers and Pinafore
And whistle airs from Pirates, Patience, Gondoliers and Pinafore
And whistle airs from Pirates, Patience, Gondoliers and Pinaprinafore

Then I can give a clever pun on the word orphan, frequently
And sing soprano solos very tenderly and piquantly
And I'll watch operettas whether laymen's or professional
I am the very model of a G&S obsessional


In fact when I know what is meant by "emeutes" and "parsonified"
When to a peer or pirate I am quickly matrimonified
When I have learnt the range of G&S's cornucopia
And when I have a leading role as someone in Utopia
When I consider "dammit" as some sort of profanity
When love for G&S is undistinguished from insanity
When everything I say sounds like some Gilbertesque type liturgy
You'll say a better Savoyard will never ever sit a gee

You'll say a better Savoyard will never ever sit a gee
You'll say a better Savoyard will never ever sit a gee
You'll say a better Savoyard will never ever sit a, sit a gee

For then my very presence, though distinctly incomparable
Will be to anyone with sense, entirely unbearable
So I will use this parody as some kind of confessional
I am the very model of a G&S obsessional