Sponge and Jelly, Kirch, Jimbo and Stacy
Early one morning when
At Dough Roller they ordered pitchers
A little before ten
Sponge ate something, looked like, used tampon with eggs and ralph
As Jimbo stood up to hit the bathroom, to get a hold of himself
He turned and said, "You see that couple, at yonder table? Something don't look right
The one on the left might have breasts but...then the other might
Both have long hair with soft curls
But tell me, which one's the girl?"

Same drunk guys
And that girl
Late that afternoon
Sponge went behind some old sub shop and
Went into the bathroom
Jelly came, blocked the door closed
With a baseball bat
Sponge swung at it with a broom but Jelly...grabbed the broom away
And Jelly said "While you're stuck we drank your six-pack, scarfed your steak and cheese
Feel free to drop the kids at the pool
Just don't play with the bees
Give the toilet a whirl
But Sponge, try not to hurl"

Stumblin guys
Passed out girl
Hurricanes for laughs
Dude spilled his drink on Kirch so dude gets drenched...with a Big Ass Draft
Jimbo came back to the bar, lookin for a fight
Poor Jimbo could barely stand so, Kirch called it a night
And Kircher said, "Let's get our drunk asses home now
Pass out and sleep till ten
We'll throw the nerf football round the hot tubs
While we get drunk again!
See how the day unfurls
Hey Jim, which one's the girl?"

Flash to Seacrets
Was telling the waitress
We beat them home and away...