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Song Parodies -> "To All The Girls I Took On Dates"
Original Song Title:
"To All The Girs I've Loved Before"
Original Performer:
Julio Iglesias and Willie Nelson
Parody Song Title:
"To All The Girls I Took On Dates"
Parody Written by:
Invisible Boy
The Lyrics
Internet dating must be tough. I've never tried it myself. It might be because I find it impersonal. It might be because I find it risky. But, I think the real reason is because my wife won't let me ! This parody is based on stories told to me by a friend (yeah...right IB)
To All The Girls I Took On Dates
To all the girls I took on dates
Some local, some from other states
I'm glad you went away
There’s much I have to say
To all the girls I took on dates
The first one was a scary bitch
She asked straight out if I was rich
She said she wouldn’t go (N.B. not the original parody lyric)
If I should tell her “no”
To all the girls I took on dates
These psycho chicks are always posting
Pathetic ads with phony stats
But when I meet them they are hosting
Gigantic butts and skanky tats
To all the girls who told me lies
While married, still, to other guys
I thank you for good luck (N.B. not the original parody lyric)
We made you spouse a “cuck”
To all the girls I took on dates
To all the girls that clung to me
While filled with insecurity
Your calling was deranged
I’ve had my number changed
To all the girls that clung to me
These psycho chicks are always trying
To meet a guy just like Brad Pitt
But when I meet them they start crying
Because I just won’t take their…pranks (memo to IB-in line two use Tom Hanks)
To all the girls who dined with me
To only get a meal for free
The evening was quite tame
Now “dinner whore’s” your name
To all the girls who dined with me
To all the girls I took on dates
Who got too drunk or showed up late
The sex was just OK
Now please just go away
To all the girls I took …on… dates
IB
To all the girls I took on dates
Some local, some from other states
I'm glad you went away
There’s much I have to say
To all the girls I took on dates
The first one was a scary bitch
She asked straight out if I was rich
She said she wouldn’t go (N.B. not the original parody lyric)
If I should tell her “no”
To all the girls I took on dates
These psycho chicks are always posting
Pathetic ads with phony stats
But when I meet them they are hosting
Gigantic butts and skanky tats
To all the girls who told me lies
While married, still, to other guys
I thank you for good luck (N.B. not the original parody lyric)
We made you spouse a “cuck”
To all the girls I took on dates
To all the girls that clung to me
While filled with insecurity
Your calling was deranged
I’ve had my number changed
To all the girls that clung to me
These psycho chicks are always trying
To meet a guy just like Brad Pitt
But when I meet them they start crying
Because I just won’t take their…pranks (memo to IB-in line two use Tom Hanks)
To all the girls who dined with me
To only get a meal for free
The evening was quite tame
Now “dinner whore’s” your name
To all the girls who dined with me
To all the girls I took on dates
Who got too drunk or showed up late
The sex was just OK
Now please just go away
To all the girls I took …on… dates
IB
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User Comments
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a raucous romp through the scary world of internet dating....much better than the original lyrics indeed
OS, wretched. Parody, good.
Scary b****es, psycho chicks, dinner whores...what's the big deal? I had all these BEFORE I started internet dating! (j/k) This is excellent
ha! loved the Tom Hanks Brad Pitt self-referential nod, IB, and I thought the whole think was bucking* good - 555
*(N.B. not the original comment choice of word)
*(N.B. not the original comment choice of word)
Thanks alvin, John B, Dee and stuart. I think this may have been offensive to some, but I didn't mean it to be.
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