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Song Parodies -> "I Can't Believe That Charlemagne Is Gone"

Original Song Title:

"I Can See Clearly Now (The Rain Is Gone)"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Johnny Nash

Parody Song Title:

"I Can't Believe That Charlemagne Is Gone"

Parody Written by:

Stuart McArthur

The Lyrics

Originally written by a Frankish minstrel in 813 (and parodied, 1100 years later, by Johnny Nash) within minutes of hearing the tragic news of the demise of the great conqueror Charlemagne......( listen to the OS in a new window by right-clicking here )
I can't believe that Charlemagne is gone
It seemed that no hun could stand
in his way
Throughout these Da-ark Ages he shone bright
so what'll we do...
with-
out our
great Charlemagne?

(uh oh, this Age...
might
become
Dark once again)

I JUST can't believe that Charlemagne is gone
he who slayed each man he set
his mind to
Louis the Pious looks like Claudius
after our great...
(great)
great (great)
great Charlemagne


Look all around...at most of West Eu-rope
yep, it's all his! (how did he do i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-it?)


I can't believe that Charlemagne is gone
joining those poor dudes who stood in his way
such as that Hunchback Pippin, and those Moors
which helped him make Gaul...
this
really
huge place today

I just hope those Vi-
Vi-
kings don't
take it away

and make it all dark...
and
cold - sort
of like Norway

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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AFW - August 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Charming bit of world history, here....Norway, am I giving you less than fives
John Barry - August 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Frankly, Stuart, this parody is, like its subject, great.
Adagio - August 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Really good one! I was envsioning quaint little medieval dances.
Johnny D - August 01, 2006 - Report this comment
Charlie Mange never sounded so spoofed!
alvin rhodes - August 01, 2006 - Report this comment
charlemagne is DEAD ????...i didn't know he was sick
Kristof Robertson - August 01, 2006 - Report this comment
"and make it all dark...
and
cold - sort
of like Norway
Great ending to a lovely bit of edgy-kayshun, Stu. Charlemagne...didn't Kylie play her on Neighbours? 555
Stuart McArthur - August 01, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks JB (groan.................groan)

thanks Alvin, Johnny D, AFW, adagio

thanks Kristof, and yes, I believe so - wasn't she engaged to that cross-dresser "MaryQueenOf" Scott?
Rex - August 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Bloody Vikings. Fine bit o' writing here.
Stuart McArthur - August 02, 2006 - Report this comment
weren't they ever - thanks Rex :-)
Arwen - August 02, 2006 - Report this comment
Excellent job, Stuart...I LOVE it. "...sort of like Norway..." LOL!

Oh, and do you know that I'm actually a decendant of Charlemagne? Of course you don't know that...but I am. I am a little bit of a Genealogy-aholic, if you must know one of my nerdier traits.
Stuart McArthur - August 02, 2006 - Report this comment
thankyou so much great (repeat "great" until lunchtime) great grand-daughter of Charlemagne....and this isn't to burst your bubble or anything, because I'm sure the second sentence of this excerpt refers to you, but the following quote from wikipedia I found very hard to believe (not being a genealogist like yourself)

"It is frequently claimed by genealogists that all people with European ancestry alive today are probably descended from Charlemagne. However, only a small percentage can actually prove descent from him. Charlemagne's marriage and relationship politics and ethics did, however, result in a fairly large number of descendants, all of whom had far better life expectancies than is usually the case for children in that time period. They were married into houses of nobility and as a result of intermarriages many people of noble descent can indeed trace their ancestry back to Charlemagne. He is without a doubt an ancestor of every royal family of Europe"

maybe the logic escapes me, but how can EVERYONE be traced back to ONE person? (not counting Adam) - did none of his neighbouring warlords and visigoths have children??
Arwen - August 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Oh gosh...now you have me stumped. I'm sure that everyone else who makes the claim is full of it...; )...but I have the pedigree chart at home, though...that leads back to him. I'll mail you a copy with my delivery receipt for the Bentley.
Michael Pacholek - August 03, 2006 - Report this comment
Let me be Frank with you: Very good parody. As for whether everyone of European descent is descended from him... Well, some of us are most desperate to prove royal blood than others. But, speaking as a Polish American, that's all in the Piast.
Meriadoc - August 07, 2006 - Report this comment
Well, I'm descended from Charlemagne too, all it really takes is one family of English gentry, and you are usually toe in. So I guess that makes me a cousin of Arwen? If her chart pans out with proper documentation of course... ;-)

Anyway, Stu, really good job and loved the ending, altho' I almost shouldn't give you fives the way you called poor Pippin names there and such - heh heh.... ;-)
Stuart McArthur - August 17, 2006 - Report this comment
thanks MP (twin groans for Frank and Piast)

ah, thanks Merry - and d'ya think I didn't strain the brain trying to link Charlie's Pippin to yours? - when I unearthed him via wikipedia, it was too good a gimme not to use, but alas...

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