Anthony works on the hospital floor
helping with baby deli-vry
"birthing in here", says the sign on the door,
another new mouth in the country
and she's pushing hard, and he says
pant pant pant pant..
you aughta know by now
remember lamaze with your hubby Grant
remember you spent all that money..

and it seems such a graceless time,
with the blood spilling all about
momma, you're legs sticking up and he's .. coming out..
Mm he's comin out, mm oo oo uh huh mm hm

doctor is bleary, and he's dead on his feet,
this labour is a never-ender
and he's dreaming of his internship
proctology's neat,
he's going to become a rear-ender
and he's trading in these babies for some crack-ack-ack-ack
he's almost done right now
if you can't thrive fixing broken cracks..
at least it's a service he'll render..

and it seems such a graceless time,
with the blood spilling all about
momma, you're legs sticking up and he's .. coming out..
Mm he's comin out, mm oo oo uh huh mm hm

you should never argue with a crazy mum-mum-mum-mum
you augtta show by now
as we wait for the time for delivery
I just hope the kid don't look funny
and if that's what he has in mind..
yeah, if he laughs as they come out..
momma you're legs in the air..
and he's comin out...
he's comin out..mm mm