I’ve been feeling this poo since I don’t know when
So I made up my mind, it must come out the end
Look at me now, feel my stomach churn
I don’t know how but I suddenly lose control
There’s a fire within my hole
Just one turn and I can feel my ass sting
One small squeeze and it comes outta my ring, o-o-o-oh

Diarrhoea, here I go again
My my, how can I resist ya?
Diarrhoea, does it show again?
My my, letting go my piss poo
Yes, I’ve been broken-hearted
Paranoid when I farted
Why, why did I ever let you go?
Diarrhoea, now I really know,
My my, I could never let you go.

I’d be shaving my nads but can‘t thanks to you.
I can’t count all the times that I’ve felt you come through
And when I go, my ass gets so raw
I feel it grow, did it go through my boxer shorts
You know I can’t wait that long.
Just one squirt and I could hit anything
I‘m the undisputed poo-shooting king, o-o-o-oh

Diarrhoea, here I go again
My my, how can I resist ya?
Diarrhoea, does it show again?
My my, TPs gone I’m half way through
Yes, I’ve been broken-hearted
Ever since my cheeks parted
My, my did I ever let you go?
Diarrhoea, runny shit all day
Bye bye, I just pulled the lever
Diarrhoea, now its here to stay
Bye bye, stains my bowl forever

Diarrhoea, here I go again
My my, how can I resist you?
Diarrhoea, does it show again?
My my, just ran out of tissues
Yes, I’ve been broken-hearted
Right when my ass tap started
Why, why did I ever let you go
Diarrhoea, now I really know
My my, least my first name isn’t Beau