What to do says I to toe he don't know, so
I will go ask some faction wits,
Think this action fits?

Effete types who all-a-time gloat
Aunts with gripes who cut us to size, they're the pits.
Eyes form into slits.

Stressed out like a millin', bawl in stupor
Try real hard to look like I'm so super (very super),
Come let's pick the interstellar
Way to kick with mandolins in our mitts.
The loss of my wits.

I might seem to presume to
Tell some clown just what to do.
And they might say 'tis not fair,
They're just posing in their lair.
Big tans, thinks he's a scholar,
Big flats, and plenty dollars.
Taking every dime,
"'Cause it's yours and not mine."

If you're blue but you don't know just what to do
You can always go against fashion wits
Don't put on the ritz.

Different kinds of daring coats, pants with stripes
And break away clothes for perfect splits
That's my kind of ritz.

Crested like a million year old rock group
Try hard not to look like Gary Cooper (they're so super)
They don't mix with Rockafellers.
They dance with candelabras in their midst.
Do whatever fits.

-tap indecisively-

Crested like a million year old rock group
Try hard not to look like Gary Cooper (they're so super)
They don't mix with Rockafellers.
They dance with candelabras in their midst.
Do whatever fits.
Do whatever fits.
Do whatever fits.
Do whatever fits.

[whispers] -

Fall down, UP clown
Don't quit 'cause it's the pits.
Whine and whine but not too soon.
Time is right for me alright now I can muse.
Muse sees the rhythm it can...
(interlude)
MOVE,
(interlude)
Glance at the fix him (smile real cheesy).

(normal voice)

He wants me to prove?
Put upon, shuttin' it down, shuttin' it down, shuttin' it down.
Now 'bout you a tale sells.

Take a chance.
Take a...........chance.

(woman with high heels walk out while music fades)

If you're blue but you don't know just what to do
You can always go against fashion wits
Don't put on the ritz.
Don't put on the ritz.
Don't put on the ritz.